It's Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self

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She introduces us to The Change Triangle, a conceptual tool, a map, to understand our emotions and discover what we are doing with them that limit our awareness and growth. Moreover, Hilary Jacobs Hendel’s writing is lucid and accessible, which makes her method as clear and practical as you can get in self-help titles.

This may include stuff like allowing yourself to feel angry instead of feeling scared, or feeling “disappointed” instead of feeling angry. I think the title was kind of 'gimmicky' and can be triggering for some people with depression, or some readers got triggered because they know people affected by depression and its debilitating effects. I’m glad I bought this book as it’s helping me on my healing journey, some things aren’t just depression so it’s good to hear what else we need to consider, what else could be the problem, this book helps you to look at other root causes to your suffering and it’s full of tools, ideas and tips that can help you heal.

I do have some misgivings about the way the core message elides material and structural considerations (classism, racism, sexism, etc. The organization of the book was non-intuitive, though, and without prior background examining one's emotions I think a reader might be lost. This book would be super helpful for anyone looking to understand themselves better and get to the root of what’s causing all the anxiety/depression in their lives. Lack of access to these core emotions is at the root of anxiety, depression, and many other problems people suffer from today.

Her description of "The Change Triangle" is a concise takeaway that I think about almost daily--how letting ourselves feel emotions is healthy rather than moving away from emotions, illustrated as living in the bottom point of a triangle rather than moving toward a defensive corner or a shame/anxiety corner. I am currently listening to your audiobook and it’s definitely in my top most influential and helpful books.Hendel does a phenomenal job of unpacking and breaking down decades of work dissecting the human brain into simple, compassionate tools of self help.